Accepted?!

I had my interview with EPIK on Thursday.  Friday I received an email informing me I had passed.  It was much faster than I had expected (being told at the end of my interview I would hear in two or three days), which I suppose is a good thing, but it really took me by surprise. 


It made everything very real, where as before the prospect of living in another country to teach English for a year felt very far off.  It went from something that would eventually happen into something that was going to happen, and in four months.  To be honest I felt a little overwhelmed.  


I've been thinking about this since December, when I first applied to Footprints to begin the process.  I've thought about the logistics, what will need to be done at my home here in the States, and felt nothing but excited over the prospect.  Now I feel decidedly hesitant.  I've left the country before for a semester in Ireland, but I knew I was coming back, and I knew when and where I was coming back to.  Now everything feels far less decided.  What if I love it there and want to stay another year, or three?  What if I have a great opportunity to teach in another country after my year in Korea?  And if/when I do come back to the US, where will I live?  I've been living in and loving Vermont for the past six years, but it's a hard job market here and the cost of living is high.  Besides, right now my major tie to the state is my live-in boyfriend, and we obviously won't still be together when I get back.  Well maybe that wasn't obvious, but it's unrealistic and unfair to both of us to think we'll stay together while I'm away for an undetermined period of time, or to think that once I return we'll both have saved ourselves and be ready to jump back in where we left off.  


So essentially I'm leaving the comfortable and somewhat stable life I've built for myself over the past couple of years to try something I'm not even sure I'll like and that makes it very difficult for me to plan my future.  Though I have my doubts I know I'm doing this.  It's something I've thought and talked about for awhile now, and being too young to settle down I feel it is the logical decision to make right now.  Ultimately, I know I would regret not going, but I don't think I'd regret not staying.